The Wedding Speech (or what should've been)

I was at a close friend's wedding recently and after it was over a bunch of met up in Goa for two days and nights of absolute fun...

On the last night, while we all chilled at Zanzibar, a bunch of people who were really 'really' close (the inner 'inner' circle - that doesn't include me) made small speeches wishing the couple and what it's mean to them etc...

Here's mine (I sent them an email) - 

Ever so rarely you meet someone with whom you wanna share most of the things that life has to offer. Ever so rarely you meet someone that you're also willing to suffer through the annoying and difficult parts of their personality and the attachments that they come along with - ever so rarely these things even become fun. I remember how much I used to find stretch marks terribly unattractive until I fell in love with a girl who had a few... and then I actually missed em! Love has a way of obliterating things that would've ordinarily mattered. And it's wonderful to see it in the two of you. I even remember enviously walking out of XYZ's cabin in office several months ago when I saw how happy he was and wondering when/if I would ever have such emotion...

The funny thing about marriage though is that it needs more than just love. It is possible there will be times when it will feel so difficult to love each other. You guys will need to learn to forgive (sometimes, its possible it won't be easy... and will take time), to communicate (and that includes listening!) and to be insanely patient and strong for each other. I'm definitely not one to take any relationship advice from :) but always place the most importance on the bond that now binds you guys - in times of love, difficulty, illness, sorrow and come what may.

I see such a wonderful happiness in the two if you - you guys make 1+1= Infiniti. It has such a positive effect on the people around you as well. It makes me think it's not such a bad thing to be vulnerable.

From the bottom of my heart (which isn't too deep)- I wish you guys the best and all the things you guys wish for yourselves. Here's to awesomeness.

*skulls whiskey* 

Sometimes, the universe needs to make a choice for you...

I'm tired of choices. Of making em... or not.

The old adages... they seem to all make sense. And I don't care.

Go on, make me an offer I can't refuse.

As there is a void... there is an answer.

Too tired, distracted and un-motivated to write... listless, if you will.

But life, has a way of changing on you. You start off as a child... dreaming. And then somewhere along the way someone says "stop dreaming..." and still you don't. But you realize you aren't necessarily living your dream. A little later... you realize you aren't even chasing em.

And then, on some days, they don't matter.

But you never stop dreaming.

There must be a reason. Hain na?

A Prayer

Dear God/Universe,

Thank you for everything you've given me. It's really great and I do value everything a lot. Family, friends, love, warmth, wealth, intelligence, goodness and so much more...

I'm having a few problems and I really need your help on these a little bit. I know you're probably watching me and helping out as it is, but I'm just raising these anyways...

- I need to learn and enjoy moderation - especially when it comes to my drinking. I drink way too much and often don't know my limits. I used to like the madness. I don't know why I did. I want to stop being that way. I cant understand why I needed everything to be crazy... Life is not a movie and I need to understand that its not necessary to be dramatic. I need a little calm.

- I'd like to be a better influence to the world and people around me - there are things about me that're very selfish. I wish I could lose them as much as possible. I'd really like to be able to make the people around me happier.

- The Emptiness needs to go...

Thanks again!

David's 10 Maxims for Life

Yesterday, I had the pleasure and honour of listening to one of my colleagues share some of his life lessons and speak about 'How to be a Good Agent'. And while it seemed as though he was talking about work mostly, to me it felt entirely like he was actually talking about life. These were some great and valuable insights into how to approach life and I really wanted to share them with you... I even made notes!

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1. Its Nothing more than a Little Hard Work...

No Matter how hopeless or difficult a situation may seem, no matter how daunting and intimidating a task at hand may be, no matter how depressed or low something has made you... the truth really is that all it takes to get back up, to find that solution, to dig yourself out - is a little hard work. Break it down, bit by bit, step by step... keep at it. And soon you'll be at mile by mile...

2. The Key to Success is Just Showing Up...

Sometimes you win half the battle by just showing up. You have to get off your ass and get into that room. Its half the battle won already.

3. Celebrate your Accomplishments. But Always, Strive for Excellence (and then more!).

It's really important to be able to look back and be happy with what you have achieved. And it's equally important to be able to look forward with humility and strive to be the best you can be.

4. Don't Worry about what They are doing. Focus on what YOU are doing.

Yes, the world is probably a fiercely competitive place. But why allow someone else to dictate your standards of efficiency/effectiveness/satisfaction/life? Do things in the manner and approach that make you happy!

5. If you want something, you have to take immediate and deliberate steps to achieve it.

Often when faced with a daunting task, we procrastinate or don't know where to begin. It's one of those classic cases where we suddenly wake up one day and realize time has passed us by and we didn't do anything about it. It's important to act. And it's important to act in a deliberate manner (which is not to be confused with being restless and impatient). 

6. Respect Everyone.

It's one of the hallmarks of a good human being.

7. There's a fine line between Confidence and 'Cockiness'.

It's called humility. Let it soak into your being. Funnily, humility is a quality that most genuinely happy possess.

8. Don't just be there in Success. Be there in Failure as well.

Most people remembers the ones who were there for them when they're down and out. If you really want to make a difference in someone's life, make sure you're there for them when they're down.

9. It's Better to Have It and Not Need It... Than to Need it and Not Have It.

There's no harm in being over-prepared. Don't overburden yourself but try to avoid winging it. Chances are, you'll get caught out. You never can be entirely sure of what kind of situation you're stepping into. 

10. Hard Work Drives Everything.

If you don't put in the heart, you will never come out with the muscle or the wisdom.

Bonus Maxim 11. Information is only Good if you Use it.

Never stop listening. Keep your ears open and hear what people are saying. There is a world out there as well.

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A successful person is not the person who wakes up in the morning with the most money, women or the largest house... A successful person is someone who wakes up in the morning and looks forward to their day (and going into work!)

The Bitter-Sweet Emptiness of the Adultery that Never was

He dreamt of her, laughing through the sunshine of the day,

But woke up next to someone else...

He may have whispered sweet nothings as they slept,

Which were never heard...

The Emptiness, it has it's Place...
And what an Irony that is...

They'd laughed like mad children,
At the way that they'd know what each was thinking,
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But now the sounds that're heard are of intoxicated voices
Flush with lies and temporary meaning.

The heart wants, what it cannot have.

So i'm sorta reviving an old post (that I didn't post since I didn't wanna seem defeatist). And it's not really how i feel at this point. But it was/has been how i felt a few days ago...

I used to feel like less of a man, the morning after. Which is the exact opposite of how I should've felt. I guess it doesn't matter and I know it'll change.... when it does. There was a need to drift along in intoxicated spirits and cheer ... and there was a need to 'get on with it' and put life in place with sobriety (it a pattern!).

I know it's gonna be great again. There might be a little emptiness today, but it's a lot less than what i felt a few days ago. And it shall pass. Bit by bit. Mile by mile.

I do feel better already. Bring on life!

The Upside of Endings and Goodbyes...

Life comes with it's share of farewells and adieus. Choicelessly.

I can't say I know a single person who hasn't felt tragic pain and loss in these circumstances. Some of us deal with it better than others.

I dont take well to farewells. In fact, it seems pointless that everything must come to an end - if that's what's gonna happen, then why even begin? Why struggle? Why celebrate?

Well, honestly I don't know. It sometimes feels like we just need to be pre-occupied. Like we're not supposed to ask about why we're going on a journey but go along anyway. Yet strangely, life is like that... as surely as it starts, it will end. And so must everything.

But I realized something about endings - that they challenge you and force you to evolve and find new meaning. To somehow find a way out of the pain you feel to experience something new that will eventually carve a new meaning in your life.

And one day, you will say bye to that too. Deja Vu!

Yet, there is always endless beauty in each of these. Its great to have moments to cherish.

Texting the Universe

I've so many things to be thankful for... family, friends, career, fair amount of wealth, comfort, intelligence (I'd like to think in abundance!), a nurturing atmosphere, charm, luck and so so much more.

I hate to crib. I really do... so please do think of this as more of a confession...

There's a tiny emptiness inside of me. It sorta seems to grow inside of me on some days and on others it wanes. On its bad days, it has a way of sapping the juice of life... on others, it kinda sugars into the milk...

Or am i exaggerating? I dont know.

But, I'd like it to go. Disappear altogether.

I just wanted you to know...

And once again, thank you so so much.