If...

If I was richer... 

I'd travel a whole lot more.

If I was wiser...

I'd save a little bit more.

If I was better looking...

An actor I'd be.

If I could sing...

I'd waste my time seducing women...

If I hadn't gotten Polio...

An athlete I'd have become? Or maybe not.

If I wasn't as intelligent...

I would've been unbearably annoying!

If I was smarter...

I'd have made more money.

If I hadn't been so uncool as a kid...

I wouldn't have done the crazy things I did as an adult!

If I had more guts...

I'd actually find a cause worth fighting for... and fight for it.

If I had more guts...

A politician/activist I'd become.

If I was stronger...

I'd never be lonely.

If I had more passion...

An out-of-work stage actor I'd be...

If I had less ambition...

A stoned, out-of-work stage actor I'd be...

If I had less insecurity...

I'd feel a lot younger.

.....

If I wasn't me...

I wouldn't be.

.....