This is a post about Hank Moody (from 'Californication') and me... and the reasons why I hate where the creators took the show over the last two seasons...
Hank is the rebellious cynical half-poet with undeniable dark charm and affinity for the prettier sex who somehow always seems to have countless women throwing themselves at him in spite of the messed up situations he gets into... and yet deep down he's really just a one-woman guy madly in love with his ex-wife and daughter... But he just can't seem to keep it together...
so, the truth is... there is so much about Hank that i identify with. I know how he does 85% of the stuff he does to keep himself occupied... to keep himself distracted... to help himself deal with the fact that you dont always get what you want... and yet he knows its possible he's just making excuses to himself...
In the show hank says some of the most candid, irreverent and honest things a man feels... how in times that're ridiculously serious we'll feel like looking at a pair of tits for example. None of us would ever dare even allow the thought to linger. Hank will revel in it... and in some situations he's painfully loyal in his own twisted way... and Yet in others he'll just walk outta the room where he was with the love of his life and make out with the next set of legs that walks by - a walking contradiction. And in others, he'll say the coolest, most poetic (which are sometimes strangely irreverently honest) things... here's a few... (including the title too!)
Hank is the rebellious cynical half-poet with undeniable dark charm and affinity for the prettier sex who somehow always seems to have countless women throwing themselves at him in spite of the messed up situations he gets into... and yet deep down he's really just a one-woman guy madly in love with his ex-wife and daughter... But he just can't seem to keep it together...
so, the truth is... there is so much about Hank that i identify with. I know how he does 85% of the stuff he does to keep himself occupied... to keep himself distracted... to help himself deal with the fact that you dont always get what you want... and yet he knows its possible he's just making excuses to himself...
In the show hank says some of the most candid, irreverent and honest things a man feels... how in times that're ridiculously serious we'll feel like looking at a pair of tits for example. None of us would ever dare even allow the thought to linger. Hank will revel in it... and in some situations he's painfully loyal in his own twisted way... and Yet in others he'll just walk outta the room where he was with the love of his life and make out with the next set of legs that walks by - a walking contradiction. And in others, he'll say the coolest, most poetic (which are sometimes strangely irreverently honest) things... here's a few... (including the title too!)
"A few things I've learned in my travels through this crazy little thing called life. One: a morning of awkwardness is far better than a night of loneliness."
"You can't snort a line of coke off a woman's ass and not wonder about her hopes and dreams, it's not gentlemanly."
"There's no easy way to say this so I'll just say it, I met someone. It was an accident, I wasn't looking for it, it wasn't on the make, it was a perfect storm. She said one thing, I said another, next thing I knew, I wanted to spend the rest of my life in the middle of that conversation. Now there's this feeling in my gut she might be the one. She's completely nuts in a way that makes me smile, highly neurotic with a great deal of maintenance required, she is you, Karen."
"I have a confession to make, I didn't like you very much at first you were just this annoying little blob. You smelled nice, most of the time, but didn't seem to have much interest in me; which I of course found vaguely insulting. It was you and your mom against the world, funny how some things never change. So I cruised along doing my thing, acting the fool, not really understanding how being a parent changes you. I don't remember the exact moment everything changed, I just know that it did. One minute I was impenetrable, nothing could touch me, the next my heart was somehow beating outside my chest exposed to the elements. Loving you has been the most profound, intense, painful experience of my life. In fact, it's been almost too much to bare. As your father I made a silent vow to protect you from the world, never realizing I was the one who would end up hurting you the most. When I flash forward my heart breaks, mostly because I can't imagine you speaking of me with any sort of pride. How could you? Your father is a child in a man's body, he cares for nothing and everything at the same time, noble in thought... weak in action. Something has to change, something has to give."
Hank makes being a major fuck-up look cool. He really does. I hate that they reduced him to being a total mess. I know it's just a show... and I know life isn't rosy... we all have our defeats and victories and I guess there really is no single rule that applies to life and the world...except, that it moves on.
But I wish they hadn't made him fail at the things that mattered most to him - Karen (his ex-wife) and his daughter...
I sometimes feel like I know Hank... in me. A friend told me very recently that she didn't know why i didn't show the 'real' me to people... that if i did, they wouldn't stand a chance and would all love me choicelessly. well, i thought they did anyway... well ok, not really. but I kinda make do with whomever I'm talking to... 85% of the time I'm not even interested (no offense here btw! The issue is me.)... I'm only passing time i guess... So honestly, I rarely care. I rarely have the patience.
But I know i'll be great when i feel like i want to. I hope at least. When passion finds itself in my life. And the passions that have found emself in my life.
Finally, to Hank I say... "Take it easy Moody, it's just a show... it aint life."
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